today i remembered that i had a blog hehe
not much going on lately... same things basically
i turned 22 a few weeks ago... getting old now :(
but that's pretty much it
Friday, August 6, 2010
Monday, September 7, 2009
wahhhhh!
today I started writing a new story, this time it falls under the category of a FANFIC... fan fiction
I'm nervous because I never wrote one before, my story's may have borrowed actual peoples names but never fell under this category before. it's involving snsd or girl's generation, wonder girls and Big Bang. not all the members but only a few fro each group. since I'm a rookie at fan fiction I searched online and found some great sites for fan fiction
and soompi also has a section for fan fiction
ah! wish me luck in the success of fan fiction!!!
~ Aida
I'm nervous because I never wrote one before, my story's may have borrowed actual peoples names but never fell under this category before. it's involving snsd or girl's generation, wonder girls and Big Bang. not all the members but only a few fro each group. since I'm a rookie at fan fiction I searched online and found some great sites for fan fiction
and soompi also has a section for fan fiction
ah! wish me luck in the success of fan fiction!!!
~ Aida
Monday, June 15, 2009
what a day
hello all:)
I have returned with awesome awesome news:)
first of all Wonder girls are going to tour with the jonas brother. I'm not a fan of the dudes but I'm nervous and excited for the wonder girls!!!
today I heard a clip of the english version of "nobody" and my opinion is.... I love it, sohee is a bit hard to understand but sunmi was great. I can't wait for the full release... june 27 is just around the corner!!! COME FASTER!!!!!
I spent the weeked with my nephew Jose luis. it was a fun weekend, pretty much the best of my life:)
anyways~ I must go to sleep I have a long day tomorrow
~ AIda
song: so hot
artist: Wonder Girls
mood: tired
I have returned with awesome awesome news:)
first of all Wonder girls are going to tour with the jonas brother. I'm not a fan of the dudes but I'm nervous and excited for the wonder girls!!!
today I heard a clip of the english version of "nobody" and my opinion is.... I love it, sohee is a bit hard to understand but sunmi was great. I can't wait for the full release... june 27 is just around the corner!!! COME FASTER!!!!!
I spent the weeked with my nephew Jose luis. it was a fun weekend, pretty much the best of my life:)
anyways~ I must go to sleep I have a long day tomorrow
~ AIda
song: so hot
artist: Wonder Girls
mood: tired
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
hello
sorry for being so absent, i have been real busy gathering myself for the past few weeks, forgive me for not attending to my blog
update: no! i haven't grown yet:) just kidding. this month has given me some great memories and such good days. wonder girls were in Los Angeles recently, they flew back to Korea today. they have two blogs that they update as much as they can. it's really cool seeing the girls write in English, if it's them who actually wrote it, but according to the blog, the girls went shopping, met some fans, met celebrities and wrapped up some events on their schedule.
anyways....
i have to run, i have to get ready for bed.
good night
~ Aida
song: move
artist: wonder girls
mood: sleepy/ happy/ drained
update: no! i haven't grown yet:) just kidding. this month has given me some great memories and such good days. wonder girls were in Los Angeles recently, they flew back to Korea today. they have two blogs that they update as much as they can. it's really cool seeing the girls write in English, if it's them who actually wrote it, but according to the blog, the girls went shopping, met some fans, met celebrities and wrapped up some events on their schedule.
anyways....
i have to run, i have to get ready for bed.
good night
~ Aida
song: move
artist: wonder girls
mood: sleepy/ happy/ drained
Thursday, December 11, 2008
damn that stylist!!
why would you make someone wear a dress that was too loose on them? i mean are you asking for a wardrobe malfunction???
at 2008 golden disk awards...wonder girls leader min sun ye was wearing a pretty but bad dress, i would post a picture but i don't think its right...if i could I'd remove all her pictures from the net...the damn dress was falling off!!! she kept trying to pull it up in place but with each step she took, it inched downwards....normally sun ye is the first one out of the veichle, she normally smiles with such power, but you can see it in the pictures, you don't need her words or a video to know she was uncomfortable, she smiled but it was more like she only did it to not disappoint any one, cuz she's like that, she doesn't like disappointing fans...but jeez it really pissed me off that she had to wear that...all the girls had on pretty dresses, they looked stunning but sun ye had the dress that wasn't suit for her....LET ME AT THE STYLIST!! just kidding, but for real...next time make sure the dress FITS!!!
after a while sun ye was able to change so she was back to the dorky leader min she is:)
the girls also performed 5 in 1 remix of "nobody" which was AWESOME! sun ye had a jazz remix, and she dominated the stage, she dropped it like it was hot!, sun mi had the pop remix, which fit her since she's SO cute:) it was well done too...sohee had this rockish r&b remix which was awesome, sohee danced better then ever! kudos SOHEE!! yeeun had the r&b soul type remix, which is her style of singing so she rocked the house with her amazing diva vocals...then yoobin obviously was the rap remix or hip hop..which was hot too...i cant pick a favorite since al five girls did amazing, and the music was also amazing....then they ended the whole perf. with the girls joining yoobin to finish the song....JOB WELL DONE! whoever thought up that perf. is a genius....best perf since wonder girls debuted!
wow...i went on a little rant huh? ha ha....you love it...not really:(
gotta go watch wonder bakery episode 5 and 6....
~ Aida
song....singing "nobody" in my head:)
mood: mad/happy/hyper/sleepy
at 2008 golden disk awards...wonder girls leader min sun ye was wearing a pretty but bad dress, i would post a picture but i don't think its right...if i could I'd remove all her pictures from the net...the damn dress was falling off!!! she kept trying to pull it up in place but with each step she took, it inched downwards....normally sun ye is the first one out of the veichle, she normally smiles with such power, but you can see it in the pictures, you don't need her words or a video to know she was uncomfortable, she smiled but it was more like she only did it to not disappoint any one, cuz she's like that, she doesn't like disappointing fans...but jeez it really pissed me off that she had to wear that...all the girls had on pretty dresses, they looked stunning but sun ye had the dress that wasn't suit for her....LET ME AT THE STYLIST!! just kidding, but for real...next time make sure the dress FITS!!!
after a while sun ye was able to change so she was back to the dorky leader min she is:)
the girls also performed 5 in 1 remix of "nobody" which was AWESOME! sun ye had a jazz remix, and she dominated the stage, she dropped it like it was hot!, sun mi had the pop remix, which fit her since she's SO cute:) it was well done too...sohee had this rockish r&b remix which was awesome, sohee danced better then ever! kudos SOHEE!! yeeun had the r&b soul type remix, which is her style of singing so she rocked the house with her amazing diva vocals...then yoobin obviously was the rap remix or hip hop..which was hot too...i cant pick a favorite since al five girls did amazing, and the music was also amazing....then they ended the whole perf. with the girls joining yoobin to finish the song....JOB WELL DONE! whoever thought up that perf. is a genius....best perf since wonder girls debuted!
wow...i went on a little rant huh? ha ha....you love it...not really:(
gotta go watch wonder bakery episode 5 and 6....
~ Aida
song....singing "nobody" in my head:)
mood: mad/happy/hyper/sleepy
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
hiyah!!!~
a few recent pics..my sister Mari is gonna kill me for posting up her picture, she is camera shy:)..me too but she hates her picture being taken
my niece janitsa...she's the princess:)...and she's a weird 3 year old too:)
today nothing new happened it was a real big boring day full of nothing! my sister and her kids stopped by...only for a few minutes though....ummmmm...not much else to say
i am really slacking in the poetry department...I'm trying to put all my focus on my current stories..i have 4 I'm working on...i know i should finish one then move on but i get many random and different idea so it becomes multiple stories at once....
its a pain in the neck since i constantly jump from character to character or language to language or story mode to story mode
99% of my stories are written in 1st person...i like to jump into the character's head...that way i know what they think, what they say, what they do and why..ya know?? for me it's the only way a story can be written successfully
now if you were to read my stories..you'd think i don't know much English:) my method of writing...whether it be a poem or story or just a journal entry...i write how i speak..though from time to time I'll write how Americans should talk but i cant do it for long since i don't talk that way...I'm a slang chick, i try to use little words...i say little sentences so i don't have to talk much...ha ha sounds like a disorder or something:)
any who--------- whenever i give stories a break I'll resume poetry and give you something new and fresh to read..but! as for right now....I'm gonna be creative with videos and pictures
~ Aida
song: river flows by yiruma
mood: tired
Sunday, December 7, 2008
what today has handed me
this might be a bit random but hey! so what?
i was supposed to see my grandmother and uncle today, actually they are in new york so they were going to spend a few days here...it's been over 10 years since i saw either of them so i and my family were very very excited and anticipating today...but plans changed at last minute so they weren't able to make it here, I'm bummed out but I'm more concerned for my mom...she hasn't seen her mother in so long so it had to of hurt her 100x more than it did to us
so yeah that was just a random moment...a rant if you will:)
for the WONDERFUL readers, if you don't check out soompi or any other wonder girls related blog, wondersubbers have subbed a few more videos..make sure to find them on YouTube and see them...it's highly recommended by me:) and please respect their rules, i don't want the wondersubbers to stop subbing because the rules keep getting broken:) please and thank you:)
on another note.........i slept very little again but woke up somehow refreshed...but then it turned into aggravation!! my niece and nephew spent the night 2 days in a row so they gave me a headache..i love them being here but sometimes enough screaming from them is enough..know what i mean?
anyways...I'm off to find something to do...wish me luck in that:)
peashhh out!
~ Aida
i was supposed to see my grandmother and uncle today, actually they are in new york so they were going to spend a few days here...it's been over 10 years since i saw either of them so i and my family were very very excited and anticipating today...but plans changed at last minute so they weren't able to make it here, I'm bummed out but I'm more concerned for my mom...she hasn't seen her mother in so long so it had to of hurt her 100x more than it did to us
so yeah that was just a random moment...a rant if you will:)
for the WONDERFUL readers, if you don't check out soompi or any other wonder girls related blog, wondersubbers have subbed a few more videos..make sure to find them on YouTube and see them...it's highly recommended by me:) and please respect their rules, i don't want the wondersubbers to stop subbing because the rules keep getting broken:) please and thank you:)
on another note.........i slept very little again but woke up somehow refreshed...but then it turned into aggravation!! my niece and nephew spent the night 2 days in a row so they gave me a headache..i love them being here but sometimes enough screaming from them is enough..know what i mean?
anyways...I'm off to find something to do...wish me luck in that:)
peashhh out!
~ Aida
Monday, December 1, 2008
december is here~
Saturday, November 15, 2008
long day...
BUT TOTALLY WORTH THE LONG-NESS!!!~
i watched Mnet MKMF...all of it..i even had my nephews lulu and Timmy watching it with me (not by force they loved it)
dsbk, big bang, wonder girls, shinee, winners!!!
wonder girls took home the best M/V...the best female group and song of the year!! wg took the best award home!! it was AWESOME...yeeun, sun ye, sun mi and yoobin cried after finding out they won the song of the year...sohee..not really she looked like she was in shock.....but damn i never seen them cry like that....tears of joy but allot of tear..especially yeeun and sun ye
WG did 2 new versions of their hit song "nobody" there was a disco version...they did it with 5 members of the hot group 2PM...they had hot ass moves too
watch it it is hot!!
big bang did a special stage with lee hyori....t.o.p kissed lee hyori!! ahhh!! she's lucky:)
dsbk performed clips of a few songs then "mirotic" but like a rockish version...i didn't like it at the beginning but then i got used to it
the ending made me cry even more (wonder girls had me crying on their song of the year speech)...i saw some dsbk members tearing up and wonder girls bawling!!...wg bowed to their fans...basically saying thank you for getting us here?..it was really cute but hurtful at the same time
if you would of heard me when they we showing the nominee's for song of the year....i was impatient and they KEPT STALLING! but once they said " and the winner is....(20 minutes later..:) j/k) WONDER GIRLS~~~...I SCREAMED IN JOY....like a freaking chick too...it's like nothing felt better than hearing that name...i never wanted to hear their name that much before....wonderfuls worked their ass off voting...Korean American whatever..we came together and voted....they gave registering instructions to non Koreans and voting instructions as well..we really came together and look at the result..wonder girls took home 3 big awards..i am very proud of the and the fans
that's it for now..my fingers are hurting:)
~Aida
i watched Mnet MKMF...all of it..i even had my nephews lulu and Timmy watching it with me (not by force they loved it)
dsbk, big bang, wonder girls, shinee, winners!!!
wonder girls took home the best M/V...the best female group and song of the year!! wg took the best award home!! it was AWESOME...yeeun, sun ye, sun mi and yoobin cried after finding out they won the song of the year...sohee..not really she looked like she was in shock.....but damn i never seen them cry like that....tears of joy but allot of tear..especially yeeun and sun ye
WG did 2 new versions of their hit song "nobody" there was a disco version...they did it with 5 members of the hot group 2PM...they had hot ass moves too
watch it it is hot!!
big bang did a special stage with lee hyori....t.o.p kissed lee hyori!! ahhh!! she's lucky:)
dsbk performed clips of a few songs then "mirotic" but like a rockish version...i didn't like it at the beginning but then i got used to it
the ending made me cry even more (wonder girls had me crying on their song of the year speech)...i saw some dsbk members tearing up and wonder girls bawling!!...wg bowed to their fans...basically saying thank you for getting us here?..it was really cute but hurtful at the same time
if you would of heard me when they we showing the nominee's for song of the year....i was impatient and they KEPT STALLING! but once they said " and the winner is....(20 minutes later..:) j/k) WONDER GIRLS~~~...I SCREAMED IN JOY....like a freaking chick too...it's like nothing felt better than hearing that name...i never wanted to hear their name that much before....wonderfuls worked their ass off voting...Korean American whatever..we came together and voted....they gave registering instructions to non Koreans and voting instructions as well..we really came together and look at the result..wonder girls took home 3 big awards..i am very proud of the and the fans
that's it for now..my fingers are hurting:)
~Aida
Monday, November 10, 2008
the days
ugh..what a sucky day...this world is lacking in things to do
i am really bored...but because of my bordeom i added a few new sentences to my korean data base (right or no?) well yeah i have quite a bit more things to learn but slowly i'm getting there....s-l-o-w-l-y
hmmm..nothing else going on soo bye bye~
~ Aida.....has no music playing
i am really bored...but because of my bordeom i added a few new sentences to my korean data base (right or no?) well yeah i have quite a bit more things to learn but slowly i'm getting there....s-l-o-w-l-y
hmmm..nothing else going on soo bye bye~
~ Aida.....has no music playing
Saturday, November 8, 2008
hello
um...i am slacking with this blog:( shame on me eh? haha i have just been busy with the hell of life...
anywho - i dont have much to say...not much new in music world not much new with me...so what do i share?
http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=tWg9_oh5rLQ .. my nephew scarlo singing along to wonder girls recent hit "nobody" its kinda loud because he had the mic really close to his mouth..but it's still cute
thats all for today...until my brain comes back:)
~ Aida
song : this song by : 2AM
anywho - i dont have much to say...not much new in music world not much new with me...so what do i share?
http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=tWg9_oh5rLQ .. my nephew scarlo singing along to wonder girls recent hit "nobody" its kinda loud because he had the mic really close to his mouth..but it's still cute
thats all for today...until my brain comes back:)
~ Aida
song : this song by : 2AM
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
the beggining of a new world
so today voting was held....it was hectic and still is since they havent announced who is our new president....i hope obama wins and from what i can see he is winning....but....who knows who it'll be? something might happen that Mccain wins or obama wins:) no idea
um...updates on music....wonder girls are doing a reality series on Mnet called "wonder bakery" very excited to seem them a another reality series..we had mtv wg season 1, 2 and 3...then self camera episodes on Mnet...there might be more but i dont remember....sunye has to be haapy because she gets to cook and yeeun has to be haapy because she is surrounded by food!! haha some fans cal her hungry hippo..not to be mean but cuz she is always eating..and she weighs about 100 pounds or something like that...but in korea thats a bit big...she's the biggest wg...so imagine how small the smallest is...90llbs?...
anywho - i mentioned Big Bang hosting a concert here in the states...i am still excited!! i hope i can go so i can Mr sexy man Tae Yang:)
gotta go my back hurts and i'm sleepy
song playing: "lie" by Big Bang
mood: sleepy yet excited
~Aida
Thursday, October 30, 2008
updating
hello:)
whats up? um its been a while since i even visited my own blog..sad right??? yes i know
um...tomorow is HALLOWEEN!!!boo!!!!yes yes yes..it is also my little brothers birthday..he'll be 17 tomorow.exciting we're going to see saw 5 i cant wait!!!!!!
anywho - i am geting sick:( my throat is making me mad....so i've been forced to drink some water mii dont like water, yeah its good for you and needed to survive but i avoid pure water AKA water alone...anyway i can...but i needed to drink it in order to sleep last night
ok!..i read on soompi that wonder girls are having their first concert in feb. 2009 in korea then in march or may (one of the M's) they'll host a concert in the states!!!! i is excited
then i also read that big bang ( b to the i to the bang bang!) will also host a U.S concert!!! whhhhaaaaaa!!! that's double the happiness...i doubt i'll be able to go to either but hey...i'll try
ok..i shall go now to surf the internet:) i'll be back with a new poem to add to the edition
ja ne!!!!!~
~ Aida~~!!
Saturday, October 25, 2008
good day!:)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tWg9_oh5rLQscarlo went on a singing rant today..singing 3 asian songs..it was cute
Friday, October 17, 2008
today
seriously...it's not a good day for me
it started out early and with not so joyful news..i guess October is a bad news month..maybe due to Halloween? i don't know
so i was immediately....torn as soon as i woke up
and now that the day has ended it hasn't gotten any better
for those of you that are familiar with me, whether it be personally or threw another website or what ever the connection...those that know me well enough know the struggles i put up with daily
this post will only be understood if you REALLY know me
for the past month or two i have held back many things from people, even if i needed to let it go it never came out, it could be fear causing this but I'm not so sure
so people in my life don't know the truth behind the constant smiles or the constant randomness of mine...pretty much everyone believes I'm the normal Aida, with random phrases, laughing for no reason, speaking randomly etc...when in reality, its all just a cover up....i will not discuss the truth behind this post due to many many reasons, but if you insist on knowing ask and you may probably receive depending on who you are
i say that because i have trust issues....i don't trust everyone i know or anyone that i come in contact with...i don't really trust anyone unless they've proven to me that their trust is worth grasping
this blog was created to share my thoughts on different things, culture, music, hobbies or even politics if I'm in a good good good mood
i don't tell people much to begin with so take this as a rare post..you really wont see these often, and the next post you might say "oh she's over it now" that's just really the cover up part of how i handle things
anyways..this post is pretty much pointless since this blog doesn't get read so
peace!
~Aida
it started out early and with not so joyful news..i guess October is a bad news month..maybe due to Halloween? i don't know
so i was immediately....torn as soon as i woke up
and now that the day has ended it hasn't gotten any better
for those of you that are familiar with me, whether it be personally or threw another website or what ever the connection...those that know me well enough know the struggles i put up with daily
this post will only be understood if you REALLY know me
for the past month or two i have held back many things from people, even if i needed to let it go it never came out, it could be fear causing this but I'm not so sure
so people in my life don't know the truth behind the constant smiles or the constant randomness of mine...pretty much everyone believes I'm the normal Aida, with random phrases, laughing for no reason, speaking randomly etc...when in reality, its all just a cover up....i will not discuss the truth behind this post due to many many reasons, but if you insist on knowing ask and you may probably receive depending on who you are
i say that because i have trust issues....i don't trust everyone i know or anyone that i come in contact with...i don't really trust anyone unless they've proven to me that their trust is worth grasping
this blog was created to share my thoughts on different things, culture, music, hobbies or even politics if I'm in a good good good mood
i don't tell people much to begin with so take this as a rare post..you really wont see these often, and the next post you might say "oh she's over it now" that's just really the cover up part of how i handle things
anyways..this post is pretty much pointless since this blog doesn't get read so
peace!
~Aida
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
random
i cant sleep again so I’m dropping a new ost
i haven’t been keeping up with the poetry i just havent had time or have been willing to type a poem..call me lazy!
um....yesterday was my brothers 29th b-day so a happy birthday to danny!!!
not much else going on
OH! ~
i made a list of all the stories I’ve written and it’ll share them below:
NAME - PAGES - MODE - STATUS -
" lie" 7 1 st person finished
"love = pain" 9.5 1 st person finished
"long time no see" 15 1 st person finished
"change of heart" 3.5 1 st person finished
"love too many" 3 1 st person unfinished
"wasn’t meant to be" 41 1 st person finished
"behind my back" 1 1 st unfinished
" betrayal" 1 1 st unfinished
"writing is magic" 3 1 st person unfinished
"school" 1 1 st unfinished
"sudden change" 2 1 st unfinished
"fantasy/crash" 3 1 st unfinished
"no fairytale" 11 1 st unfinished
"orphan" 1 1 st unfinsihed
" lover or friend" 2 1 st unfinished
"crush" 1 all modes unfinished
"finally" 1 1 st unfinished
"til i die" 2.3 1 st unfinished
"horror" 1 1 st unfinished
"dance" 0.5 1 st finished
"happy birthday" 2.5 1 st finished
"luck or what? " 86 1 st finished
"change for love" 29.5 1 st finished
"wrongful love" 1 1 st finished
"my all" 1 all modes currently working on it
the 1 pagers are the ones that are either short short short or i just lost all ideas for and gave up..unfinished means i had writers block and forgot what i wanted it to be, they are still open for me to continue if i like but as of now my main concern is "my all" sooooo..yeah I’m stuck on that one too
the story i gave hints about was "luck or what? " but i closed it and it is now completed !!!! it was the first story i actually finished
trust me i have boxes full of stories that i gave up on so this one means alot to me
going to end this post this computer is making weird noises:)
tata~
~ Aida
more crap
do you have fears??
i sure as hell do
i fear dounts people have about me and i fear neglection (if thats even a word)
i grew up hearinf so many threats about the future, as in the way we turned out to be, and i guess i just to a point where i not only believe them all but i also fear them, for me family means more to me than i do to myself, so having them suffer or hate me or whatever will kill me
i hate lieing to them everyday but although i hate it and i know its wrong i think it's best that way, the less they know the less they hurt...i cant be the one to tear this family apart, i will not be held responisible for that sort of damage, i refuse to be the ouytcast anymore, i refuse to be the one everyone makes fun of just because i'm not like the rest of the damn worl, or made fun of because my eye is all fucked up or judged becasue of the music i listen to, or made fun of becasue i suck at talking or i'm not the smartest girl on earth, or because i have interest in learning other language and culture, i hate being that girl that people go to just because they have a fucking problem and then they remember that i do fucking listen
i now stand away from you bastards that always thought i couldnt do nothing, you bastards that never looked twice at me because i'm different than the worlds population, you bastards that made me cry in school because i was too afraid to do a fucking speech!!! to those that know how i really am know not to push my buttons, i am bi-polar and a half and on top of that i'm a rican and padilla! but those that dont know or dont care, keep at it and i swear to god i'll make you wish you treated me with respect
they say the quiet ones are the ones you gotta watch out for....i'm quiet and i dont look for shit just to occupy my time or to make myself look tough or whatever but you push the million of red buttons i got, and best believe i'll hurt you!!
that is for all the people i went ot school with for the people who left me stranded in this place you call earth...the bastards that only use me if they dont have anyone else to fucking turn to
kiss my ass and good night!
i sure as hell do
i fear dounts people have about me and i fear neglection (if thats even a word)
i grew up hearinf so many threats about the future, as in the way we turned out to be, and i guess i just to a point where i not only believe them all but i also fear them, for me family means more to me than i do to myself, so having them suffer or hate me or whatever will kill me
i hate lieing to them everyday but although i hate it and i know its wrong i think it's best that way, the less they know the less they hurt...i cant be the one to tear this family apart, i will not be held responisible for that sort of damage, i refuse to be the ouytcast anymore, i refuse to be the one everyone makes fun of just because i'm not like the rest of the damn worl, or made fun of because my eye is all fucked up or judged becasue of the music i listen to, or made fun of becasue i suck at talking or i'm not the smartest girl on earth, or because i have interest in learning other language and culture, i hate being that girl that people go to just because they have a fucking problem and then they remember that i do fucking listen
i now stand away from you bastards that always thought i couldnt do nothing, you bastards that never looked twice at me because i'm different than the worlds population, you bastards that made me cry in school because i was too afraid to do a fucking speech!!! to those that know how i really am know not to push my buttons, i am bi-polar and a half and on top of that i'm a rican and padilla! but those that dont know or dont care, keep at it and i swear to god i'll make you wish you treated me with respect
they say the quiet ones are the ones you gotta watch out for....i'm quiet and i dont look for shit just to occupy my time or to make myself look tough or whatever but you push the million of red buttons i got, and best believe i'll hurt you!!
that is for all the people i went ot school with for the people who left me stranded in this place you call earth...the bastards that only use me if they dont have anyone else to fucking turn to
kiss my ass and good night!
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
the crap
have you ever had someone that you concidered close up until you found out they want nothing to do with you?
i have and i belive i will always run into those type of people...some woman think they attrack bad guys some men say they attrack dirty girls..i say i attrack the people that cause damage as in friend wise
.......i'm not a bad person, i listen, i give support, i do all i can to do my part in a friendship even if it cost my life...with saying that i still dont understand why people turn out the way they do...i'm not perfect thats for sure but i'm not mean, now dont get me wrong you push the wrong buttons and you'll whitness adifferent side of me but that rarely happens since i bottle everything up inside....but when someone makes a mistake i forgive them dont you?...if you murder someone then your screwed cuz i want no part of your life
but say you prank call someone and they find out its you and they get all pissed off with you, cut you off 100%..is that fair? even if you've apologized a million times and meant no harm what so ever?....if i was the "victom" i'd forgive them because i know they'll never harm me but
i dont know....people tell me all the time that i'm awesome, people tell me that i'm fun to be around or the only time they talk is if i'm the listener
why is it that she cant forgive me?
i have and i belive i will always run into those type of people...some woman think they attrack bad guys some men say they attrack dirty girls..i say i attrack the people that cause damage as in friend wise
.......i'm not a bad person, i listen, i give support, i do all i can to do my part in a friendship even if it cost my life...with saying that i still dont understand why people turn out the way they do...i'm not perfect thats for sure but i'm not mean, now dont get me wrong you push the wrong buttons and you'll whitness adifferent side of me but that rarely happens since i bottle everything up inside....but when someone makes a mistake i forgive them dont you?...if you murder someone then your screwed cuz i want no part of your life
but say you prank call someone and they find out its you and they get all pissed off with you, cut you off 100%..is that fair? even if you've apologized a million times and meant no harm what so ever?....if i was the "victom" i'd forgive them because i know they'll never harm me but
i dont know....people tell me all the time that i'm awesome, people tell me that i'm fun to be around or the only time they talk is if i'm the listener
why is it that she cant forgive me?
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Saturday, October 11, 2008
hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
i am bored and tiired
but yet i managed to write a post
i was cut open today by my 1 yr old nephew..he got me good on the cheek it hurt once he did it but after, not at all but it bled..weird eh?
anyways - i am learning BOTH japanese and korean, i began japanese first then i picked up korean due to music..so japanese because of anime and korean because of music:) sweet huh?
but my japanese skills arent as good anymore because i fail to practice, and my korean skills arent any good becasue ITS FREAKIN HARD!! i know basic words but the writing has me hung and the grammar has me drowned...it has murdered me twice!!
some say japanese is easy for spanish speaker due to the fact that we share a few words, then some say korean is easy for spanish speaker due to the fact that, un-like japanese, koreans pronounce the R's like we do but in my opinion, korean is harder for spanish speakers and japanese is only easy because of the shared words...both difficult languages
anywho - i'm changing the subject completly:)
many people belive that you need friends (or sources) in order to lead a happy life...if that's the case then i am leading no life...i make friends but for some reason they leave in some form..move away, decide to hate me, or just cut the cords for an unknown reason...i know i have many flaws and have moments where even i dont like myself...but having those flaws, insecurities and low-self-esteem doesent mean i'm a bad person, i'm sweet and understanding, i'm fun to be around
yeah i am quiet but once you get to know me and i you, i am very talkative
in school alot of people did the 'hate behind one's back" thing to me, with me giving them no reason...i only shot back twice, once in middle school and once in high school, but i was never given the oppertunity to solve it, which on my end was good enough..but i do get people that dont like me, many reasons include that i dont dress like a girl, i dont act like a girl and i make better friends with guys then i do girls....they see me as a target but they never say it to my face
the quiet ones are the ones you gotta keep an eye on...in school thats what i was..quiet only spoke to a handful of people..i sat in class quiet writing in my notebook..and yet they had the cojones to begin a battle...they escaped defeat due to the fact that i was placed in a home but like i said before, it was good on my end
ok...i went to a home right? i did almost 3 months in a detention center and over a year in the actual home...at first i didnt like the detention center, i never spoke up until the last month i was there...i got to know people by observing, i mean come on such a long period of time looking at the smae faces i knew more than they knew of themselves
then the home...i was quiet my first 2 weeks, it would of been longer but, once again i was attacked..but this time racially (not sure if that's a word but i used it)...when it comes to rasism, i take it seriously, maybe a tad bit too much..but she decided to call me a spic, say puerto ricans are dirty our woman are sluts our men are only good for low paid jobs etc....she even mentioned rasist remarks about ALL hispanics...this girl claimed she was half dominican, now to my knolage if you are half asian and half american..you can say you're asian american (key word is asian) half dominican and half white....dominican is hispanic and is in there..so it set me off....2 weeks of nothing but silence from me, this girl thought she was better than me only because she had white in her blood..i like just about anyone, but those that are rasist and think their better than anyone else...you can keep walking......i got in her face but then the staff came in and did absolutly na da for her remarks to me..that pissed me off even more, i had urges to punch the staff that was in my face, and the chick.....but instead i took a walk having a colored staff talk to me....anyways...i've had my share of trouble making in the home....but i also had points where i was a victim, that i was critisized, and i had my share of happy and sad moments...for me that place holds many memories there for me..i met wonderful people, i learned about myself more, i learned ways of coping etc....even though all but 1 person i was in there with or met there has cut the cords....i still would give anything to reunite with them, even the ones i couldnt stand
there i go..i put in a book!! sorry for making you read soo much
gotta go occupy my time:) some more!
~ Aida
but yet i managed to write a post
i was cut open today by my 1 yr old nephew..he got me good on the cheek it hurt once he did it but after, not at all but it bled..weird eh?
anyways - i am learning BOTH japanese and korean, i began japanese first then i picked up korean due to music..so japanese because of anime and korean because of music:) sweet huh?
but my japanese skills arent as good anymore because i fail to practice, and my korean skills arent any good becasue ITS FREAKIN HARD!! i know basic words but the writing has me hung and the grammar has me drowned...it has murdered me twice!!
some say japanese is easy for spanish speaker due to the fact that we share a few words, then some say korean is easy for spanish speaker due to the fact that, un-like japanese, koreans pronounce the R's like we do but in my opinion, korean is harder for spanish speakers and japanese is only easy because of the shared words...both difficult languages
anywho - i'm changing the subject completly:)
many people belive that you need friends (or sources) in order to lead a happy life...if that's the case then i am leading no life...i make friends but for some reason they leave in some form..move away, decide to hate me, or just cut the cords for an unknown reason...i know i have many flaws and have moments where even i dont like myself...but having those flaws, insecurities and low-self-esteem doesent mean i'm a bad person, i'm sweet and understanding, i'm fun to be around
yeah i am quiet but once you get to know me and i you, i am very talkative
in school alot of people did the 'hate behind one's back" thing to me, with me giving them no reason...i only shot back twice, once in middle school and once in high school, but i was never given the oppertunity to solve it, which on my end was good enough..but i do get people that dont like me, many reasons include that i dont dress like a girl, i dont act like a girl and i make better friends with guys then i do girls....they see me as a target but they never say it to my face
the quiet ones are the ones you gotta keep an eye on...in school thats what i was..quiet only spoke to a handful of people..i sat in class quiet writing in my notebook..and yet they had the cojones to begin a battle...they escaped defeat due to the fact that i was placed in a home but like i said before, it was good on my end
ok...i went to a home right? i did almost 3 months in a detention center and over a year in the actual home...at first i didnt like the detention center, i never spoke up until the last month i was there...i got to know people by observing, i mean come on such a long period of time looking at the smae faces i knew more than they knew of themselves
then the home...i was quiet my first 2 weeks, it would of been longer but, once again i was attacked..but this time racially (not sure if that's a word but i used it)...when it comes to rasism, i take it seriously, maybe a tad bit too much..but she decided to call me a spic, say puerto ricans are dirty our woman are sluts our men are only good for low paid jobs etc....she even mentioned rasist remarks about ALL hispanics...this girl claimed she was half dominican, now to my knolage if you are half asian and half american..you can say you're asian american (key word is asian) half dominican and half white....dominican is hispanic and is in there..so it set me off....2 weeks of nothing but silence from me, this girl thought she was better than me only because she had white in her blood..i like just about anyone, but those that are rasist and think their better than anyone else...you can keep walking......i got in her face but then the staff came in and did absolutly na da for her remarks to me..that pissed me off even more, i had urges to punch the staff that was in my face, and the chick.....but instead i took a walk having a colored staff talk to me....anyways...i've had my share of trouble making in the home....but i also had points where i was a victim, that i was critisized, and i had my share of happy and sad moments...for me that place holds many memories there for me..i met wonderful people, i learned about myself more, i learned ways of coping etc....even though all but 1 person i was in there with or met there has cut the cords....i still would give anything to reunite with them, even the ones i couldnt stand
there i go..i put in a book!! sorry for making you read soo much
gotta go occupy my time:) some more!
~ Aida
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