today

seriously...it's not a good day for me
it started out early and with not so joyful news..i guess October is a bad news month..maybe due to Halloween? i don't know
so i was immediately....torn as soon as i woke up
and now that the day has ended it hasn't gotten any better
for those of you that are familiar with me, whether it be personally or threw another website or what ever the connection...those that know me well enough know the struggles i put up with daily
this post will only be understood if you REALLY know me
for the past month or two i have held back many things from people, even if i needed to let it go it never came out, it could be fear causing this but I'm not so sure
so people in my life don't know the truth behind the constant smiles or the constant randomness of mine...pretty much everyone believes I'm the normal Aida, with random phrases, laughing for no reason, speaking randomly etc...when in reality, its all just a cover up....i will not discuss the truth behind this post due to many many reasons, but if you insist on knowing ask and you may probably receive depending on who you are
i say that because i have trust issues....i don't trust everyone i know or anyone that i come in contact with...i don't really trust anyone unless they've proven to me that their trust is worth grasping
this blog was created to share my thoughts on different things, culture, music, hobbies or even politics if I'm in a good good good mood
i don't tell people much to begin with so take this as a rare post..you really wont see these often, and the next post you might say "oh she's over it now" that's just really the cover up part of how i handle things
anyways..this post is pretty much pointless since this blog doesn't get read so
peace!

~Aida